Friday, June 3, 2016

The Last Stand of the Heterosexual White Male (And Why That's a Good Thing)

Everywhere on the internet, it seems, people are getting angry and yelling at one another. And usually it's because of Donald Trump. I am not here to slam him any more than I already have (though have you tried buying any Trump Steaks lately?), but to point to a larger issue that I think is driving his surge to future Fuehrer-dom, if it can't be stopped. The issue I speak about, of course, is the death of political incorrectness.

Any time I hear someone say aloud "well, we all have to be politically correct now," what I really hear is "I can't call blacks/Muslims/Hispanics/Jews/fill-in-the-blank what I really want to call them anymore." This may strike some of you as unfair, but this is my blog. You want to complain about it, start your own. Anyway, it's no secret why The Great Combover One is currently leading the GOP over a cliff of non-relevance no matter what happens in November: white people be tripping, yo.

Specifically, white heterosexual males (of which I am a member, though I'm beginning to wonder if it's worth it considering some of the company I have to keep).

During my TCTC days, we were told in Sociology that in twenty years, people of Mexican or Hispanic descent would be the majority in this country. Seeing as my last class at TCTC was twelve years ago, I'd say we're in the home stretch towards that goal being achieved. African-Americans may dominate our sports, music, and culture, but they're not a huge part of our overall population. And pretty soon, neither will we white folks be, at least in terms of dominance through sheer numbers.

All I can say is: thank fucking God.

For most of recorded history, people from the relatively small continent of Europe (and not even all of Europe; when was the last time thoughts of an Italian invasion stirred fear in anyone?) have kinda had the run of things, using their pale skin (from being so far from the sun, don't you know?) as some sort of indicator that they're better than anyone else (spoiler alert: we're not). From slavery to imperialism, colonialism to Colonial Williamsburg, we white men have had a lot to answer for, even if (as my family loves to remind me whenever I dare to be the only liberal in the room) some of us didn't have direct participation in ancient-history stuff (but here's the thing: that shit still has power over everything we do, and we don't acknowledge it at our peril). I think we white men have done some good things, to be sure: the Beatles, for one thing, and pizza. But that's an awful small amount of good to bring into the world when the balance is really scaled towards all the negative shit we've done, or has been done in our name. And it's not even stuff that we just did to "others." I'm pretty sure the Spanish Inquisition was more terrifying than anything Monty Python conceived of for the skit of the same name.

You'll notice I didn't say "we white people," because let's be honest: for most of history, women didn't mean shit to white men except as baby-makers and maybe mistresses when we got tired of making babies officially. Somehow giving you ladies the vote less than a hundred years ago means "we're good, right?" Considering how casually rape culture is taken by some of my fellow white men (most of them at Return of Kings), it's understandable that we are not, in fact, good.

So we (white men not named me) are scared of the coming loss of racial dominance, I guess. Tough shit, it's a thing and it's happening, and thank God for it. Someone else will be in charge now, as it should be. It might not happen this election cycle (hell, there may be enough crazy white people to elect a smooth-talking con artist to the highest office in the land; it's happened before), but it's coming, and soon. And we white men can be like Custer, kicking and screaming the whole way because our penis size is threatened. Or we can work with those communities that are rising up to dominate our country, and ensure that they know that we're allies, not enemies. This is a nation of immigrants, from all over the damn place. We white men have no special claim to being "American," not really.

But I'm guessing my friends who support Trump are going to hate this idea :-p

No comments:

Post a Comment